How we got SOAP

This 4th pregnancy was  difficult to say the least. Compared to others I'm sure it looked like a walk in the park but for one of my pregnancies it was hard, frustrating, and scary and some days my pessimistic side got the better of me if I'm being totally honest. I had the unfortunate pleasure of having my all day sickness last till about 7 months which is really difficult and hard when you have 3 other children and are fairly active like I am. My days are full of appointments and commitments and play dates and all sorts of things. Because I was so sick all the time I quickly had to re-prioritize what was most important to me and I had to scale back on extra stuff which for me is hard to do. I was also deemed a high risk pregnancy this time as well due to various test results we got which also meant I got to drive to Phoenix weekly for ultrasounds as well as having weekly non-stress tests here in Prescott. Due to my high risk status my doctors and I decided that I should be induced at 37 weeks to protect the health of Penelope. I had tested positive for jka and s antibodies which are more uncommon and rare antibodies to develop and there is no treatment that can be given before birth. Basically what could happen is that my body could start to attack the babies and she would become anemic and would need a blood transfusion at birth among a list of other possible health concerns that could have happened. So with all that swirling around in my brain I was more then willing to consent to an induction even though I hated mine with Abby. We called my in-laws to let them know that I would be induced on Tuesday, December 8th so they needed to be at our house by Monday night to help us with the girls and so my mother-in-law could be there for the birth. My final non-stress test went great and I was all set for my induction. My in-laws arrived Monday afternoon and we finished all the last minute items on my to do list to be ready for the next morning. Finally at 10:30 my mother in law got us to go to bed and I was starting to get nervous for the next morning. I was remembering how painful contractions with pitocin were and I was praying I'd get an epidural this time. I got into bed and was trying to get myself comfortable when I had a familiar feeling, something I hadn't felt since Olivia's birth...my water broke. It was different this time though, with Olivia it was like two 1gallon milk jugs got dumped on my bed but this time I heard the familiar pop and when I was finally brave enough to make a small cough I felt a small gush, I honestly questioned if  I had just peed myself or if it was really my water breaking after all it was still 3 weeks from my due date. I went into the bathroom and told Jacob to get his mom because I was pretty sure my water had broken, being a nurse she helped confirm my theory of it being my water and not pee. I decided to take a shower and then I attempted to lay in bed and get a little bit of sleep. Around 1 am my contractions were getting a little too intense to stay asleep but they weren't consistent so I decided to kick things into gear by walking the length of my kitchen and living room. My mother-in-law got up with me to time my contractions and I'm glad she did. My contractions became constant and never ending. Their intensity would dull but I would have constant contractions for over 20 minutes. Finally around 3am I was getting so loud that I was nervous I'd wake up the girls so Jacob, his mom, and I headed to the hospital. I had to stop 2 or 3 times from the front entrance of the hospital until I got to my room, by this time it was 3:30 and I was getting checked in. That also took forever because I kept having to stop to breath threw my contractions. When the nurse finally checked me I was almost a 7! I know my mouth dropped I just couldn't believe how dilated I was over such a short period of time. I then mentioned my very strong desire for and epidural and they called the anesthesiologist who had to come from Prescott. At this point I started to tear up a bit because it was becoming so painful and I was convinced the anesthesiologist wouldn't make it and I would once again have a natural child birth. Jacob was so sweet and told me it would be alright and that yes I might have to do this on my own but I'd done it before so I could do it again. I was the most vocal I'd ever been during this labor on what I wanted and needed and I made sure to let everyone in my room know exactly what I was feeling to ensure a less chaotic delivery then Abigail's. I asked to be checked before my epidural was placed and I was almost a 9, I decided to continue to get the epidural still because my cervix still wasn't quite ready and I desperately wanted any kind of relief I could get. For those of you who haven't' had the joy of experiencing contractions the only thing I can think to describe them is the worst gas pain you've ever felt x10 and on steroids. At least that's what they feel like for me. I had two major contractions while my epidural was being placed and by the time he was done I was at a 10 and almost ready to push. I could feel the pressure and knew it would be any minute, I once again had to wait for the doctor to get there before I could push and I was desperately trying not to till the doctor arrived. I was so exhausted by this point that I had a hard time pushing once I could but after about 15 minutes out came our beautiful healthy baby girl. I burst into tears like I did with the other 3 and held my baby girl and all the appointments, being sick, and the whole process were worth it because we now had this beautiful perfect little girl. Even as I'm writing this I'm getting teary eyed remembering that sweet moment. Penelope Lorraine Jefferies was born at 5:33 am just 3 minutes after I was scheduled to be induced ironically and just 2 short hours after arriving at the hospital. She was 7lbs 2oz and 20in long and just perfect in every way, all of our concerns for her after birth didn't come to fruition which was a relief and a tender mercy. We stayed in the hospital for two nights just to keep an eye on her and to make sure everything looked good. Jacob is in love with her name and I'm warming up to it more every day, her middle name though has special meaning to me because it was my grandmothers name. I knew early on that I wanted Lorraine to be her middle name, all of our girls have a family name as their middle name and both Savannah and Penelope have names from my side of the family and they represent people that I have a deep love for that are no longer with me here on this earth. Penelope is now a week and a half old and we are all smitten with her, she is a wonderful, calm, and sweet baby. I often catch myself in the most blissful state while holding her and rubbing her back and trying to soak up every memory of this time that I can. Life seems perfect now with our SOAP girls (Savannah, Olivia, Abigail, and Penelope).

Overwhelmed

I hate feeling overwhelmed especially when I didn't know I was and suddenly it hits me like a ton of bricks that yes I am completely and undeniably overwhelmed with pretty much every aspect of my life. I feel like I'm treading water just trying to keep up with the basic have to things in life and everything else is just falling by the wayside. I hate this feeling and its actually a feeling that is quite foreign to me if I'm being totally honest. I pride myself in the fact that I'm organized, that I really never take on more then I can handle, and that I'm a finisher meaning I always get the job done. So what's happened in the last 5 months since I last wrote that has made me feel so completely not myself? I got pregnant with our fourth baby. Now we are beyond thrilled to be having another baby, we had been trying for almost 8 months to get pregnant before it finally happened and we are so grateful to have another sweet baby come to our home. With that being said this little one has already turned my world upside down to be something that I don't even recognize. The biggest factor is that I'm still feeling sick and I'm currently 22 1/2 weeks pregnant and this is the sickest I have ever been hands down. I've also had a few complications with this pregnancy technically making me high risk and I've had more doctors appointments because of this. My house is a disaster zone most days, my kids are watching way too much tv, I still haven't folded my laundry from last week and its time to wash even more stuff, I feel like I'm neglecting Jacob and the girls because honestly I don't have any energy. I get scared that this will be my new normal once this baby is finally here, what if I have officially bitten off more then I can chew? But that's just the pessimist in me which I don't' let come out that often, the optimist knows deep down that I can do this, that eventually I'll start to feel like myself again, that slowly I'll be able to do more and actually be able to fold my laundry and if its a really good day even put it away. Because I know feeling this way is totally worth it to hold our sweet baby girl in four short months, to finally have this little one here because I've known for quite some time that she is meant to be a part of our family. When I remember all those things I don't feel quite so overwhelmed and I'm reminded of what's really important. Its not how clean my house is, how amazing our dinners are, or how many times I've gotten to take a shower in a week. Its that my family has a roof over their heads, that I have an amazing and hardworking husband, that I have 3 almost 4 beautiful and incredible children, that I understand what it is to love someone with my whole soul even someone that I haven't met yet. This life we have is a gift and its up to us to make the most of it, its ok to have bad days, to feel like we cant go on as long as we move past those feelings and realize how amazing we really are, that we can do hard things and do them well.

Here is one of the many pictures we have of our sweet little girl, also she's due to arrive the day after Christmas which also happens to me my birthday. All of us are so excite45d to finally meet her, she's shaping up to be just has lively as her other sisters since she's constantly kicking me and moving around. I know I'll have my work cut out for me fore sure but I really wouldn't change a thing.

Changing direction

You know when you get married or you're about to have a baby and people give you tons of advice? Some of it you find useful and some of it goes in one ear and out another. When I got married to Jacob I remember someone telling me not to talk badly about him to other people, that I should try and highlight his good qualities when talking about him to friends. I really liked this and for the most part I've been successful at it. One of the reasons I like this is because it makes me forget the stupid little stuff he does that might sometimes annoy me because I'm remembering all the awesome things he does and qualities he has. It helps me to fall in love with him over and over again and reminds me how amazing he really is. Now where am I going with this you might ask? Well I'll tell you; for as good as I am at following this advice with my husband I've realized I'm not that good at applying this advice when it comes to my children. Now let me start by saying how much I love and adore my girls and they have AMAZING qualities but sometimes I look at those amazing qualities and I don't see them in the most positive light, I've realized that lately I've been more negative then positive and I want it to change. I've been trying to understand my girls more and how they're personalities work and how I can better understand and help them to be the best versions of themselves. So to help me along I wanted to write little letters to each of my girls and highlight and share what I love about them.

Savannah,
 You my dear girl were born to lead and there is no question in my mind why you were sent to our family first. Since I was pregnant with you I've known you would be full of energy and full of ideas and I was right. Your mind is always working and coming up with new and exciting ideas I just can't wait to see what you'll think of next because its never what I expect. Your creativity is beautiful, you see things in such a way that you capture them beautifully and in your own unique way.You're so confident, you have more confidence them some adults and you are fearless, nothing is unattainable for you. You are independent, you don't need the approval of others to influence your choices. You are an amazing problem solver, watching you work out a problem is fascinating because I get a small glimpse of how your mind works and its beautiful. You are passionate! You feel your emotions so strongly and this can make you so empathetic and caring. You are loyal, you defend those you love with passion and care for them with such tenderness when they are hurt. You Savannah are one of a kind and it is such a privilege to be your mother.

Olivia,
 One of you strongest qualities is your sweetness. You have an amazing ability to make those around you feel joy and safe. I've seen you help bring people out of their shell and you're able to make almost anyone smile and laugh. You have an amazing energy about you. You are determined and are able to find ways to achieve whatever task is in front of you. You are aware of those around you and their feelings, you are very tender hearted and sensitive, you feel your emotions passionately and freely and you aren't embarrassed to let others know how you feel. You are kind and often put others before yourself. You are able to find happiness in the smallest things and you openly and freely show your love to those around you. Your love and spirit are infectious and it makes being your mother a joy.

Abigail,
 You possess this amazing ability to light up a room Abigail. Your laugh is infectious and you radiate happiness. You are determined!!! Nothing will stand in your way to accomplish your goal and you will find a way to achieve any task you set your mind too. You are smart, I love seeing how you look at the world and the things in it and you look outside the box. You see something for more then its intended purpose and you can see its greater potential. Watching you explore your world is a privilege, you are so curious to know how everything works and how you can make it work for you. You are SO brave!!! Fear does not stop you from doing what you want. You're active, you want to know what's going on around you and you want to see and experience life. You Abigail are a joy to love and take care of.

Have you ever done this with your kids? Actually taken the time to put into writing what it is you love about them? Maybe I'm just not as on top of it as some of you but its amazing. As I wrote about each of my girls I could feel my love for them growing as I relived memories and saw my girls the way their Heavenly Father must see them.

My Day Yesterday

This was my view all Sunday night and Monday. That's right even though I got my annual flu shot I still got the flu! Luckily it wasn't the worse case I've ever had but it still sucked just the same and I felt horrible. My littles were amazing and let me lay on the sofa most of the day and Savannah especially was so thoughtful and caring. My favorite thing she said yesterday was, "oh mom! Don't worry about being sick that just means we can do whatever you want all day." Jacob was also a sweet heart and came home and hour early so he was home right after Savannah got off the bus and helped her with her homework and made dinner for everyone. I'm still a little achy today and a little tired but I feel so much better they yesterday and I'm grateful for that.

Slow Down!

Where is time going?! I cannot believe how fast the days are flying by.Since my last post quite a bit has happened so here is the run down.

Savannah started kindergarten!!! I still cannot get over the fact that this girl is big enough to be in school. She goes to all day kindergarten and loves it, it has also been so amazing to see how much she is already learning. She can spell a few words and is just starting read very small words as well. She made it into the 100 club last week and she was beyond proud of herself. (The 100 club is for kids who can count to 100.) This girl was made for school and I hope she continues to love it and to do so well.

Abby is now 14 months which is also crazy to think about, she is starting to look so grown up and she desperately wants to be a big girl like her sisters. She is an expert walker now, she climbs on everything, and has just started talking. She can say hi, daddy, mom, Nanna for Savannah, more, thank you, bye, uh-oh, no, and more. There are probabley more but I can't remember, also she says all these in her cute baby way but for those who are around her we know what she's saying.

Savannah also celebrated her 6th Birthday in September she had been looking forward to it for months and was so exited to celebrate with her new class at school. I asked her some question on her birthday and her answers are below; What's your favorite color?, What's your favorite thing to eat?, What's your favorite thing to do?, What's your favorite movie?, What's your favorite thing about school?, and What's your favorite thing to do with your family? This little girl is amazing!!! She's such a smart girl, a fantastic big sister, so creative, fun, sassy, head strong, and passionate. There are so many things about Savannah that I admire she really is just the best.

We've also been trying to spend more time together sine Jacob is now done with school, the girls were excited when they found a butterfly in their pool.

We also went for little hike, poor Olivia got a blister so Savannah took a turn carrying her.

Abby with her BFF Jacob.

Savannah was convinced she was getting sunburned so she kept putting on more and more sunscreen.

The fair also came the end of September and as usual we had a blast! The girls had so much fun riding all the rides, getting their faces painted, seeing all the exhibits, and Savannah even rode a sheep!

One of my favorite things that happened the end of September was having a visit from my parents! We always love when they come and this visit was no exception. On their first full day with us we went to Bearizona and it was so fun. You drive threw part of the park and see bigger animals that can come right up to your car and then the second half of the park you walk threw. We saw all kinds of animals like bears, wolves, big horn sheep, bison, buffalo, otters, foxes, and some birds during the birds of prey show.

This was a shorter trip so they were only with us for 4 days but we had a blast hanging out, going out to eat, and exploring. I can't wait to see my parents again cause I can never get enough of them.

Also while my mom was here she took some pictures of the girls and I'm of course in love with them.

Lastly to start off our October we watched General Conference which as always was amazing! I love being able to hear from the leaders of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I am always left wanting to hear more and looking forward to the next session in 6 months. I once again made conference packets for the girls and had huge success, I want to blog about them so I can have a place with all the info I need for next time.

Let the Parties Begin

Birthday season has arrived at our house, in the space of 3 months we have 4 birthday's to celebrate which makes for lots of fun and lots of tasty treats. Birthday season starts with this doll, Miss Olivia! I cannot adequately express how much I love and adore this now 4 year old. Olivia has one of the sweetest temperaments and she loves to make others laugh, it never fails that she will put a smile on your face. Just being around her makes me happy and fills me with joy, she's the best cuddle buddy, and just a total delight. It is honestly crazy for me to think she's been a part of our family for 4 years already and that every moment of them has been so wonderful.

We had a joint party for Olivia and Abigail because the girls birthday's are only 9 days apart. I had a lot of fun making their cakes this year and I was really happy with how they turned out. We had a small dinner at our house with some friends, it was a great night filled with yummy food, happy kids, and great company.

Another thing that's crazy is that this girl turned one! This year literally flew by and I'm still having a hard time believing that it really has been a whole year since this little girl joined our family. Abby really is practically perfect in every way to quote Mary Poppins. Her laugh is infectious, she is so adventurous and will do whatever it takes to try and keep up with her big sisters, she gives the best kisses, she knows what she wants, and she's one of the happiest children I've ever met.

These two girls are just amazing and I cannot even imagine my life without them in it, its like before they were born I didn't know what I was missing and now that I have them I never want to let them go.

Let the Fun Begin

I am so excited for this summer mostly because I am actually organized this summer and we are going to have a blast. This summer I decided to have themed days so we're doing at least one fun activity a day Monday thru Friday. We have Movie Monday, Library Tuesday, Service Wednesday, Tasty Treat Thursday, and Fabulously Fun Friday's. I bought movie passes for the summer movie program at our local movie theater that we get to go see every Monday morning. We missed the first two weeks because we were in Maryland but we got to start up this week and the girls loved it, there is just something about seeing a movie in the movie theater that makes it so fun. I also signed the girls up for our libraries summer reading program, this summer the girls need to read for 600 minutes which means I need to read to them for 600 minutes during the summer. So far we're on track and should finish up about a week before the end date. Our library also has fun summer activities every Tuesday that go along with there theme of science that we're planning to attend as well. Every Wednesday I've decided we are doing so act of service whether it be big or small.This past Wednesday we drew pictures for some good friends and took them to their house. I also have plans to have the girls go threw their toys and donate them, I think we're also going to take cookies or some treat to our local fireman and police officers, and we also like taping quarters on vending machines for people to use. I'm not sure how elaborate I'm going to make Tasty Treat Thursday, I think it will depend on my mood, this past Thursday I read them the book If You Give a Cat a Cupcake and then we made cupcakes. I don't think I'll always have a book to go along with what we're going to make but I want to try to. We also have some big plans for our Fabulously Fun Friday's, we have season passes to the Phoenix Science Center, we have tickets to the Prescott Heritage Zoo, and we plan on doing a few day trips as well. In addition to all this fun I'm trying to have the girls outside for at least an hour a day. Its actually really hard to do that here because our backyard sucks!!!!! Its mostly patches of crab grass that hurts to walk on and dirt so our play space is pretty limited unless I want the girls taking mud baths everyday. So far we've played with shaving cream on a tarp which they loved and we did some finger painting and played with sidewalk chalk. We're wanting to get the girls a little pool so they can have some water fun since sprinklers are out of the question. Another draw back to outdoor play is its so hot here already, its been in the mid to upper 90's since we got back from Maryland and by 11 am its usually already in the 90's. I'm also getting the two big girls signed up for swim lessons this summer as well and we have another fun mini vacation planned with some friends later this summer. Did I also mention we want to try and go camping? As I write all this down I think I sound crazy but I don't care, I want to wear my kids out as much as possible while keeping my sanity. Why you ask? Well if you're a mom you probably already guessed why, I want to cut back on fighting between my girls, it also makes my kids much more willing to have quite time everyday because I've worn them out and they sleep even better then they did before because I've made them exhausted. I have no doubt this summer will fly by and before I know it Savannah will be off to all day kindergarten and Olivia will be starting her second year of preschool. I can't wait for all the fun memories we'll all make this summer and for all the fun things we get to do.

(This last picture we took after the Prescott Valley Days Parade, Jacob was a good sport to come with us since he really does hate parades. The girls had a blast as usual.)

My Happy Place

SO we just got back from a two week vacation to Maryland to visit my family and we LOVED every minute of it! We didn't tell the girls about our trip till the Sunday before and they we're so surprised and excited it was pretty much the cutest thing ever.

One of the first things we did was take a family picture which was the only thing I requested we do mostly because the last time we'd taken one was the summer after Jacob and I got married. I can't wait to see how they turned out and to have a new picture of my family to hang up. Something else we did a few different times was to go and visit my grandma McCombs as a side note, Savannah actually had a blast being there, we took this picture right before we left and she was not happy to be leaving.

Something else we wanted to do was have Abby walk on grass, she was pretty hesitant and once we let go of her....

This happened, poor girl. The rest of the trip she refused to touch the grass and if I put her out on a blanket she'd stay on it the entire time. It was actually pretty nice to have her stay in one place since she rarely ever does that.

The girls loved getting to run around my parents yard and I loved laying in the grass, living in Arizona has really made me appreciate grass and I miss it on a daily basis.

The day Jacob left we took the girls bowling for the first time, my mom and youngest brother Mark also came with us and we had a blast. The girls slowly got the hang of bowling, it took Savannah a bit to understand that she needed to roll the ball instead of attempting to throw it down the lane and poor Olivia's ball would almost stop when it hit the pins because it was going so slow.

We also had fun just hanging out at my parents and letting the girls play and have some down time but in all honesty this was one of our busiest trips yet.

On our second Saturday in Maryland my mom had to work so my oldest younger brother Jordan took us to his apartment and the girls loved it, especially since he has a cat that they could try to play with. We also went to the local farmers market right behind his house and had so much fun spending time with him.

After the farmers market the girls and I spent the rest of the day outside waiting for my mom to get home. The girls had a blast playing with sidewalk chalk and having a Popsicle picnic.

Another day my mom and I took the girls to the Children's Museum at the National Harbor and it was really fun. The girls loved getting to dress up as firemen and they got to put on kimonos. They built things with giant blocks, made paper flowers, had car races, played store, and pizza parlor. Afterwards we walked around the outlets to try and miss rush hour traffic and to wear out the girls a little more for the drive back to my parents.

The day before we left my mom had a special surprise for the girls, she took them to get manicures and I got to have a pedicure. Savannah has been asking to get her nails done forever it feels like and she was beyond thrilled.

Olivia cracked me up because she almost refused to make eye contact with the guy doing her nails and wouldn't even crack a smile for him but then she'd peek at my mom or me and give us the biggest excited smile.

Both the girls loved getting to pick their own nail colors, Savannah of course chose pink and Olivia went with a dark purple. They even got a flower painted on a nail on each hand and we're so excited about it.

Afterwards we made our last trip up to visit my grandma and the girls ran around her backyard and Savannah found the best climbing tree. She was so excited because she LOVES climbing trees and doesn't get to very often.

We were lucky to have my mom fly home with us to help me on the plane and she got to meet up with one of her sisters who flew into Phoenix so they could have a mini vacation together up in Sedona.

Jacob came and picked us up at the airport and Savannah and Olivia ran to him as soon as they saw him which is one of my favorite things they do. Now we're getting back into the swing of things and we've started our summer of fun which I'll post about later.